Castro

 This is my Second Quarter Memoir Vignette. I wrote it and then recorded my voice and music. We had to use stylistic devices and speak about our lives and something meaningful to us. I hope you enjoy it! media type="file" key="Castro Art & Journey.mp3" width="240" height="20" align="left"

 This is my ending of 9th grade. Well to be honest this is like one big journal of my 9th grade year. I would have to reflect on some questions I was asked before I get to the journals I did during my 9thgrade English course. So in this story, I will take this and my memories throughout the rest of my high school years. This is a big step for me so I’ll have to make it fun while I can.

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 The first thing when I look at this, I look back from me starting from a freshman that nobody knew, to where I had not taken steps to get where I needed. I took giant leaps to get here. If it weren’t for a lot of teachers and students I wouldn’t have made it this far. I used to look at myself as a person who gave up on things very fast. But since time has passed I have found my true inside. I am a very deft person. I think when I do work or something, I would like people to look at me as a regular person. Not a person that is always being funny. I like showing people my work but I wish they could understand it more. And over the time I think people are starting to see that in me. ======

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 Well I would have to look at my strengths from when I started 9th grade English. I think over time my strengths have changed a lot. When it comes to reading I’ve been more active in the stories. So my strengths would probably being more engaged and getting most of what needs to be done. I do have weaknesses and that is getting the stuff done on the date it is due. Another one would have to be me understanding the stories and topics. I would still work on being on time with due dates and understanding work as it is explained. ======

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 So to explain my experience on doing this project I would have say I struggled in the beginning and finally came up with what need to be done first. So during the time of writing this project I had people read over it and they were very eloquent to what I had wrote. I had one big issue on doing this project. I thought I would not get it done on time. And I thought I would’ve failed what needed to be done. But to resolve my problem I asked teachers to go over what I had got done. I also kept myself limited to any distractions. ======

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 The piece I’m most proud of is what I have achieved in the time as a 9th grader. I loved learning new things and achieving what needed to be achieved. I had a blast doing everything during this course. I have changed a lot since my work and study progress has improved a lot. And this is just the beginning of my story. ======  “Journal” (September 30th)

“What makes a good story? How do you like to tell stories? How do you like stories told to you?”

 So to make a good story to me I think it the person should have passion of what it would be about. Even if the story is a horror story if you have passion it will be a horror story or whatever type of story your going to tell. Well when I tell my stories I like it to be a story will people laugh. Most of my stories are very funny or about something funny I’ve seen. I like telling my stories while I’m moving around, but I think people understand my stories the way I tell them. So when it comes to people telling me stories I’m that type of person where I get bored very fast. So I’ll fake laugh with the person cause I just want to go be active and if the story is funny ill like to picture that persons story. “Journal” (December 16) “What would you change about yourself?” Well I would say over years I have changed a lot and still changing. But there is one thing I would want to change the most and that is to think before my actions. I say that because I really never think before I say or do something. I think if I change that I will achieve what I want to do in the future. But it takes a lot of progress to do that so that’s why I start now. Since the beginning of 9th grade I realize I need to start thinking before I make a move. I try to think as it was like I’m playing Monopoly. And that is what I would change about myself for the future.

“Journal” (April 12) “Have you ever felt guilty about something you’ve done? Or unable to focus? Sleep?” I would say yes. I felt guilty for a lot of things I did in the past, and it really made me stay off task. If I did something that I was told not to do I would think all night to come up with a way to fix my mistake. I think everyone tries to fix their mistakes. I know I try to hard and then I shut down or get very frustrated. Sometimes on what I did I know can’t be fixed so I’ll leave it alone or just do something to get that thing off my mind. “Journal” (May 10) “How does childhood shape a person?” I would say from my experience my childhood shaped my personality a lot. I always liked to draw on things and just imagine stuff. How I see things with kids now if the kid is bad I see him or her growing up to be very nice and a good future. When I see a spoiled kid that acts all innocent I say their going to be very different. The more spoiled they are they’ll either be locked up or don’t have as bright as a future. “Journal” (November 30) “Why do we write?” In my own words to answer this would be in multiple ways. So when someone asks this question it matters on what they mean. For example like say if you’re a writer and you wrote a story you could write based on facts. That mean you write to teach people or just because you want it to a famous type of writing. I write a lot to tell people stuff instead of just telling them. I think if we didn’t contact someone by writing nothing would be the same. I always thought if there were never phones you would have to write all the time. I never liked to write but now I am starting to get use to it. Writing is very important use in life. “Journal” (May 20) “How do you stand up for what you believe in? How easy or hard is it? How do others influence your choice to stand up?” So whenever I believe in something I would try to express what it is. Before I came to SLA I never really expressed what I believed in. I still have a hard time doing it because I can never have people understand it the way that I say it. People usually ask me to stop talking cause I don’t know what to say or because if I try to answer a question I never say my answer in a way that people understand. I often make my self look very stupid. But after I met a lot of people like Mrs. Dunn, Jas, and Mr. Lehmann I have change a lot of my sentence to where people understand what I mean. It is very hard but it’s getting easier as time goes on. I have an example of what I like doing and it’s making people smile or laugh. And there’s a program called city year and I know a lot of people and this guy Alex he works there and he told me I should go for what believe in. And we talked for a while and he was said I would do great for comedy or something that you like to use your energy on. For some reason I felt happy because he said that I always wanted to be on TV as a comedian and a lot of other things but I was very relieved that someone actually talked to me about that. But a lot of people influence me on what I believe in.

“Kindred Essay” Loyalty is a strong thing in everyday life. Racial loyalty is a very crucial thing but also can get people through their day. Also in the end racial loyalty has changed many people’s lives. Butler uses racial loyalty throughout the whole book. In the book she uses it to prove a point, or hurt people in a racial way. She uses racial loyalty to try and teach a behavior. Racism is a learned behavior from people around you or things seen, through actions. Dana is speaking, when it comes to seeing the children imitating slavery. The quote comes from the chapter The Fall, on page 99. The scene is harsh; it is the scene where the kids are playing a game. Not only is it a game it’s a game that they do not realize what they are imitating or playing. It the game of “slavery”, the kids play this game while they have free time when they are not working on the fields. Kevin is telling Dana that the kids do not understand. Dana turns to Kevin and says, “They don’t have to understand. Even the games they play are preparing them for their future and that future will come whether thy understand it or not.” Understanding is not what those kids are seeing or obtaining. The kids are receiving the knowledge of slavery and how it should be dealt with. The kids are thinking about what they are doing, so right there it is not understanding. It’s being taught. Butler wants to show that from actions shown from other people children will learn, so racism is taught to them.

Dana once again is speaking this time scared. The quote comes from the end of the chapter The Fall, on page 105. In the scene Dana has noticed Nigel trying to teach Carrie how to read. He was only doing this because she could not speak at all. Dana out of reaction had to stop Nigel, knowing he would get in so much trouble if he got caught. Not only him but her also, so eventually she decides she will teach Carrie secretly for herself. They got to work in a room that no one goes in often. After getting settled in Dana explains to Nigel, “I teach you in here because Sarah said I could, and the Weylins seem to never come out here.” Dana is a very smart black woman, but teaching is not what she is worried about. She is worried about getting caught and being whipped. A white slave master and his family do not think that blacks or any colored person are smart enough to read or know how to write. Butler is showing that whit people cannot allow blacks to be smart, and this is something someone is taught. This is the narrator talking, about lies said about slaves. It was found in the slave narrative, What Slaves are Taught to Think of the North. It is mentioned in the first paragraph right at the top of the page. Before the quote nothing was really said except for how the slaves would be put down and how things would get said that are not true. The narrator said, “but if you were to hear the enormous lies they tell about their slave.” not only is this wrong, but whites should not have the rights to talk about their slaves, owned or not owned. The slaves probably had so many thoughts running through their heads. The narrator really does not think about what they are saying, but with this they knew what they are saying. Whites are cruel when it comes to talking about blacks, and it’s not their fault they were taught. Way back in the book, Dana’s co-worker is talking about and making fun of how Kevin and Dana are a couple. In the chapter The Fall, on page 54 is when this all happened. While this happened Dana and Kevin were sitting together getting to know more about each other, and the co-worker was just sitting there laughing to himself. While Dana and Kevin were talking the co-worker walked by laughing he said, “You are going to write some poor-nography together!” The co-worker knew exactly what he was saying. He is a grown white man that is very knowledgeable, especially if he is involved with writing. When the co-worker was walking by he was most likely thinking of Kevin as a downgrade now. He most likely cannot imagine that a white man and a black woman are going out or dating. Butler put them in this position because she wanted to show how people of the present day react to seeing an irrational couple. This would have never been said if racism was not learned from anybody else. Rufus was speaking to Dana, complaining about Nigel picking on him. This was on page 143, in the chapter The Fight. During this Rufus was getting ready to go out and find Alice, and Rufus commanded Nigel to drive. Then Nigel turned around messing with Rufus and told him to drive. Rufus was caught off guard and threw dirt at him, and Nigel reacted the same way. Then Rufus said to Dana, “here I am all crippled up and he’s taking advantage.” Rufus is only complaining because he knows that Nigel cannot pick on him like that, and he is most likely trying to get him in trouble. Nigel did not realize what Rufus was doing he was just messing around thinking that they were joking as friends. Butler made Rufus have a different look on the whole situation then Nigel had on it. Rufus was taught to complain about anything a black person does wrong, or something a white person does not like. Racism is a learned behavior from people around you or things seen, through actions. The advice that was found backed up this thesis very well. You learn racism it is not something you have to do. Most people will say things that are not of their intentions but from what they hear other people saying. The people that say things about other people do not say it because they want to be meaning they say it because they want to be like them. As you see racism is learned, and you only learn it from other people and seeing other actions. Racism will follow everyday from here on now until forever. There is no way to get rid of a learned habit.